gazeem was obviously less than worthy

I used to have a blog, it was shit because i was 16. Then i had another one and it was infinitely better. Then I got facebook

Blogging is only good when it is a short story in 21st century postmodern techno internetz form. I like stories so i'll try to tell stories and not useless carp about me. There's too much carp on the internet. Not enough porn though.

One of my favourite things to do is learn useless information and then pull it out on quiz nights. For example, did you know switching letters is called spoonerism? Saying "jap of flapan" instead of "flag of japan" is spoonerism, in my experience, spoonerism creates lolz.

Here is a list of some things about me:

1. I had my first day of university today. I haven't used a pen much over my gap year; I suspect I may have carpal tunnel, or lupus

2. I can dislocate my jaw at will. My orthodontist wanted to shatter my jaw and remake it but i said no thanks Orglen (that's his name).

3. My favourite smell is burnt hair

This evidently failed my efforts to not write about myself. I'll try better next time -- in the meantime if you'd like to know more about me send a package of diet coke to my address